Yeah, you read it right, I bought a pair of handcuffs for Baba. The baby is now the proud owner of some menottes so that I can tie him up at lunch and dinner times. Remember my post about weaning being an art and how jolly I was about it? Well, the picture is totally different now…
Baba is turning into a real little cochon when he eats and I am sick and tired of it. Literally, he won’t stay still when I feed him any solid food. As we are merely having soups, mashed fruit and vegetables and other easy food that doesn’t need chewing, the experience is a proper mess every time….
It looks pretty much like that indeed. Not to mention that he also manages to spit it. Therefore, I am sometimes myself covered with it. Not that I mind a free carrots’ mask. It supposed to be good for your complexion but I think I am fine to do that myself with some proper beauty products. Another thing he likes doing, which doesn’t help? Monsieur decided recently that he needed to be in control and would hold himself the spoon.
Malheureusement, Grumpy Boyfriend had an excellent idea to teach Baba to hold his biberon on his own. Therefore, le petit monstre made the decision that it would be the same when he had solids. No need to say that Grumpy Boyfriend is now banned from the kitchen at meal times. I don’t want him to give the baby some other great ideas like feeding himself. I am dealing perfectly with the situation; well kind of as it looks more like a battle every time I am giving Baba some kind of solids…
So I went shopping yesterday and purchased the most beautiful pair of handcuffs. These black fur handcuffs are a must-have for a mummy who is weaning her baby.
The shop assistant was a bit surprised at first when I asked her to try some handcuffs on Baba to make sure they would not be too loose-fitting. Then came the decision of the colour. To be honest it was pretty annoying that they didn’t have any in blue. Only black and pink were available so I went for the first option. It seemed quite appropriate and black is so classy. A bargain as well! Only £8!
Mummy is a génie! You can even steal my idea if you want. I don’t mind really; happy to help anytime.
And now our meals look like that:
The perfect advert for happy families! That is us ☺.
It’s such a relief. I feel so much happier now that I am fully in control of the situation.
Dear readers, this post is a joke! You seriously didn’t believe that Frenchie Mummy bought a pair of handcuffs?! I knew that you would click on a post with such a title… ?Don’t be too ashamed. Vote for us for the Mumsnet Blogging Awards 2016 for the Best Comic Writer category. If you haven’t done it yet, you have until 31st July. It’s very simple; just click on the link above. Merci from a crazy Frenchie Mummy x
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